So you’re pregnant and quarantined during a global pandemic. You’re feeling quite alone and isolated. This should be a time when you’re the center of your social circle, you’re connecting with friends and family, having parties and celebrating and feeling all of the love that your world has to give.
Why is it that during a time when the entire world is experiencing the same isolation do we feel alone? Strangely enough when we are in groups we often feel the most alone than ever.
TIPS TO NOT FEELING ISOLATED: BE REAL
Connect with family/friends more electronically.
The use of facetime, Duo and zoom can connect us more than ever and using these technologies during the pandemic can make us grossly aware of how often we COULD HAVE been using these prior to a global pandemic to connect with friends and family that live far away from us. The global pandemic can be a forced learning opportunity to encourage us to connect to people in our lives who we may not normally think to connect to in this way. Everyone gets distracted with work or the routine and often forgets to connect with family/friends as often as they should. Take this opportunity to connect to your grandmother, mother or aunt who may not typically use this technology but whom you can connect with on a new level even though you are physically apart.
Connect on a deeper level with those you are closest with
Oftentimes society and social media encourages us to connect with as many people as possible on a surface level but research shows that deeper connections with friends and family create more happiness. Having strong social supports is important now more than ever when you’re pregnant. You need the social support more when pregnant and once the baby is born, especially if you dont currently have a partner, your partner is in the service or you’re separated due to the coronavirus etc. Use this time as a motivator to make deep connections. Select 2-3 friends/family members whom are most important to you and that you have the best connections with on a deeper level and spend time and energy developing these relationships. Share your fears with them and be vulnerable. Being vulnerable molds deeper connections and oftentimes allows others to feel safe enough to also share their feelings with you which can create lasting bonds.
Connect with others going through similar experiences
Social media can oftentimes make us feel isolated as much as it makes us feel connected, however using social media in the right ways can connect us to social circles which we otherwise wouldn’t have access to. Join a facebook group for mothers going through similar experiences, there are many groups focused in on specific topics. If there is not a social media group for you and what you’re dealing with create one! There are enough people in the world chances are you are NOT ALONE. Helping others within a social media context can feel good and research shows it releases feel good endorphins to help others. If you improve your own mental health it improves the health of your baby.
Use this time to reconnect with yourself
Society has us running constantly, especially as mothers. If you are working, this is not your first child or you have any other competing priorities you may feel as if you don’t have any time for yourself. Being in tune with your own fears, desires and things you’re grateful for are key to being in tune with yourself. Take time for yourself to meditate on what you want, what you visualize for your family’s future, acknowledge your fears and desires and state them outloud to make them real. Feel your feelings, develop a plan of action and move on with your life. Often we don’t stop to FEEL what we are feeling. Stop… breathe… feel your feelings and label them, state them out loud and you will retake control over your life. Know thyself.
Remember that this is a global trauma we are experiencing. It is ok to not be ok. No one is really OK right now and listening to how we ourselves and those we love are feeling is important to living this new normal while not ignoring the fact that we’re living it. Next time someone asks you how you are, maybe answer truthfully instead of answering “I’m ok” or “good”, because we know the answer is much deeper.
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